Batman & Robin Review

It is worth being specific about the failure, because it is not simply camp. Camp requires commitment, and this film has none; it is a series of product placements strung on a plot about a plant woman and a freeze gun, delivered by actors who appear to be in four different movies. Arnold Schwarzenegger, paid enormously, speaks almost entirely in refrigeration puns delivered at a volume that suggests he was recorded in a different building.

George Clooney does a bemused talk show version of Bruce Wayne and has admitted as much. Uma Thurman is the only performer who picks a register and holds it. Every set is lit in the same two colours, the action is cut so fast that the choreography is invisible, and the emotional core, Michael Gough's dying Alfred, is the one honest thing here and is buried under neon dinosaurs and a hockey game on ice. The suits got nipples again and a credit card appeared. Warner cancelled the follow up and left the character alone until Nolan. That was mercy.